Below are the 20 most recent journal entries recorded in mikesimbiotic's LiveJournal:

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Friday, June 10th, 2005
10:54 pm	Thank god for music... Today was pretty boring, but productive. I woke up at 9am, and I made myself a big and nice breakfast, took a shower, talked with my mom, and then went to take the finals. I knew the answers on the finals, they just took damn long like always. When I got home from taking finals, I wanted to hang out with people, but apparently everyone I know wasn't around. So instead I went and I studied a bunch more of my music theory, and I practiced guitar until 3 oclock; I wrote 3 or 4 compositions in E Lydian, E dorian, and E mixolydian. The piece in Lydian got me going, and reminded me of my love for music, it reminded me of a style I once loved by randy rhoads. The past few days were pretty irritating, but honestly I'm unaffected by all the negativity that was surrounding those days. In my opinion, Karma will strike back those who put that negativity around me for unjust reasons. If I were to get angry or worked up over those negativities, then I would do something to make their days like mine, but only to get the same thing in return on a different occasion. I know that atleast one day in these people's lives, they will have a horrible experience, and wonder why it happened, and why it happened to them, and etc... And even though I don't know when that might happen, or how it could happen, I feel secure with myself knowing that to me...that will be the day they get their bad karma back. Whether or not I know when or where or how it happened, I know someday of their lives are going to be miserable, and one of those days is a day reserved by me. I'm not preaching anything, I'm just trying to explain how I like to think nature can balance itself out in order to placate my soul. I'm really happy now, knowing I'm back to my old self. Music is in my heart, and the desire to play it out is what fuels me again, and it just feels so amazing to have this passion again. Nothing can put me down. On the subject of today again...At guitar lessons I was happy to be able to know the answer and be able to play all the complex music/theory my teacher threw at me. When you understand it the way I can now, it's like the most gratifying thing around. I got home around 5 or 5:30, and I was planning on spending my night with just a friend talking and enjoying the time given, but it didn't happen, but it was no big deal...the world doesn't revolve around me, and it's all good. I originally had plans to hang out with kevin, since it's been awhile since we hung out, but he didn't answer his phone all day. Sitting home got me to thinking about this summer. I really just want to leave bucks county and everyone in it(except my family and my grandma) the entire summer, and go somewhere like the shore. I plan on driving down there a lot this summer and hanging out with my cousin at his shore house. Next weekend I'm going down with my bro and people and staying with them, but I'm gonna go hang out with my cousin and go have fun and let loose. Bringing my acoustic too, so I can go and sit on the beach at night and just play forever. Monday I'll be home for my 17th birthday,and I'm spending it with my family, then I'll find something else to do with OLD friends, and friday I go back to work again. So that's about it. (5 Comments |Comment on this)
Monday, June 6th, 2005
6:24 pm	Check this out, let me know... UPDATED!!I've been writing my written part of my english final, and I figured I post what I have so far in the first two paragraphs to see if anyone has any literary criticism for me..... Final Exam-Written Reflection Every year that passes by brings forth a bountiful potpourri of understanding. The magnitude of personal growth I have endured within this past school year seems to be utterly astonishing. Whether it is cultivated morality or even literary advancement, my sophistication all together has grown immensely. The evolution of my personal adeptness first began with a seemingly useless writing assignment. This writing assignment determined my future grade for my English class. Although I was not aware of a substantial amount of knowledge required to complete the basics of this assignment, I came to a provocative realization, and completed the given work. An aggrandized perception of morality, and self discipline are a few of the attributes I have gained from this past year. I have learned a greater understanding of the present world, and as always…understanding brings maturity. Nothing can match the knowledge one gains throughout a year of life. The situations a person such as myself are inclined to encounter are infinite at minimum. I have accomplished a great deal throughout this tortuous year, and I hope to learn even more next year. Every year I find myself facing an excruciatingly difficult task. Essentially, I prostrate that task, and in reaction I gain my own salutary benefits. My most recent arduous task was a writing assignment based on the play Othello. At the time that this writing assignment was established, I had broken my leg in three places. The results of my tragic injury left me oblivious to the essentials of this writing assignment. Usually, my mental audacity for frustration would result with my resignation for effort. That did not become the case with this task. This writing assignment really seemed to provoke my will to work. The gratification of my hard work placated my soul immensely, and changed my audacity for the better. Intense mental stress, drama, and prestige are just some of the feelings I have gone through this past year. I have become more aware of the gargantuan world around me. The accountability for my increase in understanding lies solely on this past year. As time advances, I experience bountiful interactions that are both positive, and negative. The outcome of these situations is always some type of meritorious understanding. This past year I have learned many things, at the least. The most considerable lesson I have learned has much to do with my maturity. I have learned to take action, even in an uncomfortable situation. Normally, I could never build up enough courage to interact with an uncomfortable situation. This trait hindered my own personal growth. I find great exuberance in my new maturity, and I am already reaping the benefits from my growth. As I look back on this past year, I can only think amicable thoughts of approval. My acceptance lies strong, despite any negative situation I was obligated to encounter this past year. I cannot begin to express the numerous accomplishments I have assembled within this past year. My writing assignment on Othello may have been my greatest accomplishment, but it is only one out of a thousand accomplishments. I cannot even begin to process the amount of change I have gone through this past year. The level of maturity I express now is impeccably prominent to my level of maturity in the past. When I think about all I have gained throughout this past year, I can only begin to imagine what I will gain next year. I have only one goal for next year, and that is to emulate what I have achieved this past year. It's double spaced on Word, so if it doesn't come out like that here...whatever. I have to finish this tomorrow in class.*EDIT* I finished it, and this is how it sounds now, the format is different on LJ, but read it, I don't think there's any way I don't get a perfect score. (Comment on this)
Friday, June 3rd, 2005
11:33 pm	I guess I'll update... So...It's almost the end of the school year. I can walk now, and achieve my normal activities/martial arts, I just have to be cautious. That's all good. I guess I'll update on what's been going on lately. Lately I have been really pissed off. I have no idea why, but my temper has become very very short, and increasingly uncontrolling. I don't know why, usually I'm really mellow, and tolerant, but lately I've just been snapping at everything. I know for a fact that this next week, until school is completely over...I am going to be extremely short tempered, and grouchy as hell. The stress of studying for finals, and getting missed work handed in is going to have it tolls on my allready dissipated temper. What else? hmmm... I've been writing some awesome classical compositions on guitar lately, actually I'm very happy with them. I've increased my music theory knowledge with augmented study habbits. It's very gratifying to write such beautiful/classical material, and at the same time understand it perfectly. I've also set-up my work out schedule since a little before last month, and I've increased my strength immensely. I'm doing a sweet pyramid program for lifting, and it's really effective and sweet. It's kind of addicting haha. I have no clue what lies ahead for me this summer vacation...To be perfectly honest, I don't really care...I'm most likely going to end up working most of the summer, and the days I don't work I'll probably end up practicng guitar and martial arts/lifting. I can't wait until next year is over. god I can't. I don't know why I'm so irritated lately. later-Mike (1 Comment |Comment on this)
Wednesday, April 6th, 2005
11:50 pm	Spring... It's so awesome that spring has finally come, and it was soooooooo beautiful out today...I'm so fucking pissed that I have to sit inside like a crippled shitball, when everyone I know is enjoying such a beautiful day. I have the best luck...This leg better heal quickly, because I want to enjoy these days outside, and not look out a window and wish I was outside. Today I came to school, and had to take the PSSA's instead of my classes, and after that I went to chem. where I got to talk to lauren for a bit :) but then class was boring as hell. When I got outside, I realized how much I yearn to be able to just run and lay in the grass all day, and play outside, and maybe even carry one of my amps outside and just play guitar as I watch nature. Instead, I ended in my room with my acoustic, playing as I sat by my open window for 3 or 4 hours, Imagining I was really outside. The rest of the day, I basically just watched a movie or two, came online and listened to music, and then just went back to playing guitar to express my will to walk outside and enjoy this beautiful spring weather with my friends. When I get better, I'm not wasting a minute of this...I can't wait to just drive for no reason, blasting my favorite music with my window open in my car. The best news that came from this break, is that when I get better, I get my own car (SUV). There was nobody to really talk to today, so it sucked that I ended up thinking about how much I want to just walk outside around Holland, and find my friends...:-/ but whatever, I guess I have to wait. It just sucks, and I just want to wake up and be able to walk fine, as if I never got hurt. Who knows...maybe I don't have long until I can walk again...I'm gonna do anything I can to get better, so I can enjoy days like this with everyone I know. Current Mood: disappointed Current Music: Iced Earth-Melancholy (6 Comments |Comment on this)
Tuesday, April 5th, 2005
12:38 am	OLD SCHOOL MAN....seriously. I'm probably one of the only motha fucka's to go oldschool on this site with the original layout! ha I'm just that cool. -Yesterday I had to go take my PSSA's without getting one minute of sleep. I was sooo surprised that all the answers just came to me easilly. Especially because I was so tired when I got there, that it took me 15 minutes just to write my name, and haha I messed up on it in the bubble part once hahaha. -After the PSSA testing Everyone in my grade went to lunch, so I waited for everyone to get there first, then I wheeled there ;) When I got there, I was hoping my mom might be early to pick me up, but she wasn't. I found keith and some people outside of the lunch room, but in five minutes they went to tech school. So I just stayed in a wheely outside the lunchroom by myself for 25 minutes until my mom came. - I got home, fell asleep until 4. After I woke up, I came online and talked to the awesomeness that is Kameo(eo), and when she left, I went and played guitar until 7:20. -Then I fell asleep again until now hahahaha. For some reason, I randomly got to a new level on guitar. Like everything I used to be sloppy at, or couldn't do, I can now, and I can do it as if I've perfected it, haha I can't wait to play with the band next time we have practice. -yeah nukke I rarely update, so leave some comments!!! (5 Comments |Comment on this)
Wednesday, March 30th, 2005
2:41 pm	I GOT A GANGSTA CD MOTHA FUCKA, AND A PENNY!!!YESS!!! I rule :) (3 Comments |Comment on this)
Tuesday, March 29th, 2005
4:28 pm	A few pictures from the show (4 Comments |Comment on this)
Monday, March 21st, 2005
8:14 pm	GREAT NEWS!! ;) Yeah so apparently the assholes at the ER lied to me. They told me I had severly sprained my knee, an dnothing was fractured nor was anything torn...but my mom being an RN at that hospital randomly listend to my MRI report today, and in the report it says I tore my minuscus, and I have a minor hairline fracture at the top of my tibia, and 2 other hairline fractures at the top of my femur. The fractures are the type of fractures that don't require casts, but take a lot of time to heal according to my mom, and the torn miniscus is usually something that gets surgery but in my case if I take it easy I prob. wont I hope. Which is prob. why I was scheduled for a chekc up thurs. Now I'm going to different doctors, and I'm really pissed that I wasn't informed of this before, so I would have taken it easier on my leg. Pain doesn't bother me because of my previous experiences, but time for healing does, and surgery would really piss me off. This better not take long to heal or I'll be mad...I soooo need someone to hang out with me this week. I can't just sit here on different beds and couches reading, playing guitar, and watching movies...it's more hell than any pain. I can't believe I went to a 2 hour band practice a half hour after I fractured 3 bones and tore an important ligament in my leg, and then played a show the next day too...I'm sooooo taking it easy for now on. Some people visit me, pleaseeeeeeeeeeeeeee. Current Mood: lonely (3 Comments |Comment on this)
2:41 pm	.... you know what sucks.... - Having a fucking headache that won't go away even if you have the strongest pain killers for your leg! -Barely being able to take a shower, and barely being able to take that shower without falling, and your muscles not KILLING you. -Having your body ache from using crutches. -Not being able to stand up for 5 minutes at the least. -Having to lay down every second in THE SAME position. -Being by myself the whole spring break! -Having to struggle to go to the bathroom by myself. - and a lot fuck'n more Im not gonna type. Althouhg this sucks, I know it can get a lot worse, and I know it could have been a lot worse...so basically I'm saying I'm thankfull I only have to go through this much crap, because I've been in MUCH worse casesm and this is just like a constant annoyance thats all. I just want to hang out with people. (2 Comments |Comment on this)
Tuesday, March 8th, 2005
2:41 pm	blah... Everytime I need to, and get to stay after to make up my missing tests etc...IT SNOWS and after school activities are cancelled...what the hell?? This sucks. I hate not being able to say things to people, or not knowing how, or being scared to, I'm such a ridiculous jew....Well atleast I can sleep today without having to go to work.-Mike Current Mood: hopeful Current Music: Lynyrd Skynrd-Free Bird (5 Comments |Comment on this)
Wednesday, February 23rd, 2005
4:02 pm	Random update Tonight I go to Bensalem Gym to work on tricking and everything. *YEAH!* I'm going to start working on back flips tonight :). Well hmmm...I guess I should get a little in depth on my life? School has become a bitch ever since I was sick of the flu...I still have to stay after all the way up until next thurs. so far to make up JUST tests. I have 3 essays to write for english, one that was allready supposed to be turned in. Yeah, it sucks. Apparently nobody wants to go to Jr. Prom with me, so I wasn't able to buy tickets, but I was kind of expecting that...and I'm expecting the same thing next year. I will party hop though :) I wont drink, but I'll have a shitload of fun. Friday I see Killswitch Engage, for like the 8th TIME!!! I hope I can talk to Johl from KSE again. They rule! Hmmmm....My dad broke his foot really bad, AGAIN for the second year in a row, at the same time as last year, so I'm going to have to help take care of him for a while. This month has kind of been hell on me, seriously...but I still have a smile on my face :) No matter how shitty things go, I have learned that there is always a bright side to look at sometime, so I don't care, and that all I got to say 'bout that. Damn I'm tired motha fucka. I need some sleep before tonight.-Mike Current Mood: indifferent Current Music: Ozzy Osbourne-Road to Nowhere (5 Comments |Comment on this)
Saturday, February 19th, 2005
1:18 pm	Random update What's up motha fucka! Everyone MUST see Constantine tonight! If anybody needs to know what time either call me up, or leave a message here or on an IM, I still have to talk to everyone about the times. I want to go at 8 so I can drive, but we might go at 9, not sure. Who wants to chill tomorrow??????? It's a sunday, I don't have work, no football party, no school night!..... How much do my journal updates suck? Answer: More than Pam Anderson on national fornication day (for her this is everday). (4 Comments |Comment on this)
Saturday, January 22nd, 2005
10:32 pm	Picture whore time and this time they work! I am so tired and bored and out of it I decided to do this instead of sleep ha...I took such fruity pictures of myself today after work...take a look. thats about it for the whoring of the pictures. (4 Comments |Comment on this)
8:21 pm	Sooooo....tired... I've been working with the band, my job, school, and music lessons/practice/schoolwork/driving crap every minute of the day since the begining of this week...I'm starting to get so tired I don't want to even move, right now I just want to cuddle up in a ball with someone and sleep forever. I can't stand the fact that I have work ALL DAY tomorrow AGAIN...I hope so much that we get snowed in so I can call out...why does my dad have to have this giant offroad truck that can actually drive perfect in this weather??! I'm dying, I need to cuddle with something ha, this sucks so fucking much. Someone help! (4 Comments |Comment on this)
Wednesday, January 19th, 2005
5:30 pm	Time to be a picture whore at band practice Pictures work damnit !!!! Rick loves it haha You can't see but...hes on the toilet I think Hehe I love the camera ;) I'm going to add more later...this is taking a lot of time.... (Comment on this)
Saturday, January 8th, 2005
9:33 pm	Bored out of my mind... Being home on a saturday night sucks horribly. I have to check out my amp to make sure everything is all cool with it, I think it only overheated yesterday at band practice. Lately I've been skeptical about our music...It seems that I have been wanting us to fit into a certain category of music, sort of like an old in flames/dark tranquility type sound, and I was starting to think we have to be that way to make it and to have huge sold out shows...I was skeptical of how good our music was, and I still am to be honest. I am wondering, does our music really fit in to the same professional level as a big band like In flames, or do we not? Are we really good enough to play shows on famous tours, famous venues etc...I know we are as musicians, but are we as a band? People always tell us that we are going places, they tell me or my friends or my parents that they really think I as an individual can do this for a life. I'm just pondering this, because I've been alone for three years, I've had friends, but my best friends are dissapating to average friends. I guess what I'm trying to ask is this...Are we really as good as people say, honestly can we make it with the music we have now and the new music that is a step up. I was thinking this at band practice yesterday. I think the only justification that we really are at the level and ability people say is that we might actually be as original as I have hoped we would be. I can't fit us into a category, but perhaps the only reason I wonder this is because we aren't generic. I just don't know, because we don't fit into one category...In my opinion there isn't really a band of our exact style out there, and it is hard. Maybe I'm wondering this because we have to develop our own fanbase, and we are developing our own style. I truly don't know and it bothers me so much, I just wish to do what I love, to have the privlage for someone by my side on the journey, and to inspire people who don't know that they have endless abilities in all categories. I just wish I knew how this would turn out. This music, and this band are literally all I have, and I can't comprehend it ending. I guess this is why I'm so uptight about the band to my bandmates, and why I have such dedication. I never want this to end, and I'm just going to be chill to everyone in the band, and let them all know for probably the 10th time that I feel this way and Im sure they will agree with me because they are my brothers, literally. The right opportunity is hidden somewhere for us...and I will never give up. I just hope I find someone to share this journey with also...I hate spending the day by myself...I always end up thinking about this the whole day, and trying to build an action out of it somehow in my house. It sucks. I'm going to go find something to do. Current Mood: blank (4 Comments |Comment on this)
Saturday, January 1st, 2005
1:08 am	New years.... Mike's top five New Years resolutions. 1.) Find an honest, nice, trustworthy, etc, girl to spend time with. ( 3rd year I've had this haha). 2.) Get straight A's. 3.) Become an even more accomplished musicians. 4.) Simbiotic to become to leading metal band in Philly.(so close haha) 5.) Bring my bench up to 250 at the least. (2 Comments |Comment on this)
Sunday, December 19th, 2004
3:31 pm	Wow.... Wow....that is all I have to say... I just got out of the shower, only to find out that my old friend's life may be in danger. About a year ago his mother, a good friend of my family, passed away. He is my age,and he has a brother. His father is a millionaire who owns the taxi cabs in Philly, but what does that mean in anyway? Today...He was on a bus for a school trip, and for unknown reasons the bus flipped over in a big accident. I don't know the complete details yet, or his condition. Judging on the stability of todays school buses my adumbrate is very skeptical. I am hoping he is allright, and I don't think anything life-threatening should occur, and it better not. How much can be taken from a family in such a short span of time?? This is bullshit, and he better be okay.-Mike Current Mood: pissed off (4 Comments |Comment on this)
Wednesday, December 15th, 2004
2:50 pm	Random stupidity... Yeah G-Unit I will cut you yo! Goddamn...people are right when they say I have tiny nips, hahahahahhaha. My baby I have too much crap, and that isn't even all of it. (2 Comments |Comment on this)
Sunday, December 12th, 2004
11:54 pm	RIP DIMEBAG DARREL, YOU ACCOMPLISHED WHAT I DREAM OF ACCOMPLISHING, THE WORLD WILL MISS YOU. In the past week I lost one of my bandmates. Kevin unfortunately had to leave the band for his own reasons. We are still the best of friends, all of us, but it just doesn't feel the same, nor does it feel right. I need Kevin at our shows, and by my side, even though we had our quarrels, he is still one of my closest friends. That is the only reason I am glad he left...I hope the fact that our music business is finally gone, our friendship can restrengthen. On a side note, another old friend Brian joined our band as a second lead guitarist/rythm player. Brian is basically the same person I am on guitar,music, and moral acknowledgement and standards. It proves to be a great bond for our band, as long as we can keep our egos down, and our respect high. This past week, I have been writing with Brian, and I have to tell you, I have never felt more alive then I do now. The music we have come up with is utterly shocking, I honestly can't comprehend the fact that he and I have written these wonderful songs. The only words I can say to express the nature of these songs are "JUST WAIT!" An everlasting smile has become across my face, and soon our music will be recorgnized even further throughout the world. I am even closer to realizing my life goal of inspiring those who are uninspired to the wonderful aspect of music, and the greatness it beholds. Hopefully I can achieve my goal, and I will continue to influence, and inspire those who need it even after I die. It just feels amazing to be able to accomplish so much in just sixteen short years. I look back at my past, and I look for my future, and I cannot help but smile. Whether I am alone in life or not, I don't seem to care anymore...3 years by myself has taught me many things, and influenced me to help others, and accomplish more than man can imagine. I love music, that is all I can say, and hopefully...someday, I can find someone to share that passion with. Until now I can express my soul through my music as I always have.-Mike Current Mood: accomplished Current Music: Pantera-Domination(In loving memory of Darrel A.) (5 Comments |Comment on this)